Our lives are made up of a series of relationships. Parent, child, spouse, sibling, friend, colleague. These words refer to some of the relationships we have. Some may be deep and long lasting and others more superficial and transient. I wonder which relationship is the most important in your life. Imagine if I told you that you were going to have to spend 24 hours a day with someone for the rest of your life, how would you feel? Would you want to choose who it could be? Do you have someone in mind? Perhaps you have already thought of someone that you don’t want it to be. Maybe there were several. Imagine if it was someone you don’t even like!
Well the only person you are going to spend 24hours a day with for the rest of your life is you. Now how does that feel? If you like yourself then that’s ok but what if you don’t? Wouldn’t it make sense to develop a better relationship with yourself than the one you already have?
Love or loath yourself you’re stuck with you but do you really know who you are? What relationships and events have shaped your life? What values and beliefs do you hold? Are you an introvert or extrovert? Fearless or fearful? Are you kind and compassionate towards yourself or are you quick to judge and self-critical? The voice we hear the most in life is our own. What is yours saying to you? Perhaps it uplifts you with words of encouragement such as “It is ok not to be perfect” or “You are doing the best you can”. Perhaps your inner dialogue is discouraging with phrases such as “You don’t belong”, “You’re not good enough” or “You should do better”.
We all have an inner dialogue, a type of running commentary but have you ever stopped to reflect on how you talk to yourself? The way in which you talk to yourself matters. Negative self-talk can discourage you and limit your potential. Positive self-talk can encourage and empower you.
Improving your relationship with yourself can have a knock-on effect of enhancing relationships around you as well as positively affecting the way you form new relationships.
Why not take some time to reflect on the relationship you have with yourself. After all, it is the most important relationship you will ever have.
“The way you chose to think and speak about yourself (to yourself and others), IS A CHOICE! You may have spent your whole life talking about yourself in a negative way, but that doesn’t mean you have to continue that path.” – Miya Yamanouchi
For help and support with exploring the relationship you have with yourself contact New Dawn Counselling centre today to book an assessment appointment via our website or by email. New Dawn are now offering online assessments and counselling sessions so you can access us from the comfort of your own home.